THE HOME MODEL

The Home Model is the product of Jennifer and my relationship story and what I have learned about personal growth in the last few decades. It’s true! Jennifer and I are still madly in love after all these years. I call us “relationship billionaires” rich in love.

It hasn’t always been sunshine and rainbows. We started young and passionate. That was great! Then we had a baby. That was even better! It transformed us from carefree passionate lovers into loving, caring parents. When I ask people “What was the greatest thing that ever happened in your life?” I often, nearly every time, hear “The birth of my baby.” The three of us were in heaven.

But we had to figure out how to support our lovely little family. So I started off in my career. It didn’t take long before my career was my most important thing. My career included a culture that demanded that I be and act a certain way. The next thing I knew the culture was more important than my family. Much later I discovered that many (most?) people have the same experience. The stress and pressure of the culture was humungous. I was being socialized and I was completely unaware that it was happening. ALL my attention was with my new love, my career. and she dominated my life. 

Finally Jennifer had enough. She said, “I don’t think we can stay together.” This scared me. We found a good marriage and family counselor. It took a while but we rediscovered the beauty of our natural love.

We discovered there are four humungous stressors in life. Culture was the worst. But we developed the skills and learned how to use culture like a tool for our benefit. Second was money, everything related to survival as a family, food and shelter. Jennifer turned out to be a business wizard and we learned the skills to master survival. The third was kinship and community. Our extended family has a lot of drama that we get drawn into. Sound familiar? Jennifer and I still struggle with extended family issues and we learned how to deal with it. The fourth pressure is disease. I don’t know of a family that is not affected by lifestyle models that are unhealthy. Who do you know that’s overweight and going to die early? Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to get personal. We work hard to stay well with a healthy lifestyle. These four humungous pressures are killers!

People can handle life stress, mostly. In fact people are pretty good at it. And everyone knows the uncomfortable feeling at home when one gets overloaded with stress. What happens is that the Wall of Protection goes up. The Wall of Protection is the body’s natural safety mechanism that signals something is wrong. What’s wrong is not the people. What’s wrong is the humongous stress and the lack of skills to control it. All stress is controllable when you learn how. Left uncontrolled, a home can feel like a battle ground. That’s what happened to Jennifer and me. 

What’s most important for a safe, stable family life is love, specifically loving kind people. Love is the force that keeps gravity like stress from collapsing the whole family. In the Home Model L.O.V.E. is well defined. L stands for Little things, like loving kind thoughts, loving kind words, and loving kind actions. O stands for Oxytocin, that powerful brain chemical that helps keep the emotional connection strong. V stands for Victory, especially victory over all the battles with life’s problems. We fight life’s battles better together.  E stands for Eternity, having meaning for life and the feeling of significance. With L.O.V.E. Walls of Protection come down and the family is equipped to deal with and master the humungous pressures of life. 

50 plus years later there is no less pressure than before. 50 plus years later we are masters over humongous problems. Love is thick and powerful in our home. If there are two things that I wished for you the first is that you can, relatively easily, rediscover your natural loving kind self. There is nothing greater in life than being a loving kind person. And second is this, you can control your brain and your thoughts so that you have zero negativity in your life and become a constant source of delight for others. Love really is the answer and love is the most important thing. 

The Home Model is delightfully unique. First, it is an actual model. It is visible, relatable, very challenging, inspirational and hopeful. Second, it is more about personal growth than it is about relationships. Third, many self-help book are psychological in nature. I can't find any self help books that teach about social reality and natural reality, yet understanding and controlling social reality is critical to your personal growth and happiness! Fourth, the key to personal growth is to rediscover that you are a loving kind person. It is your natural self. Jennifer and I found out that being loving kind people beautifully affects every area of life, including relationships. 

For Ordering Information Click Here https://tinyurl.com/yz8a322z

Don't Forget Our Fable in the Prologue and Its Conclusion In the Epilogue

1. Our 12 Foundational Observations. Discover the natural way (not society's way) to think about yourself and your loved ones. How you think makes a huge difference!  Controlling your brain and thinking is everything!

2. The "L" lesson invites you to accept the challenge to control your brain with love. "How to" included.  The secret to a happy and successful life (or a significant and meaningful life if you prefer) is to have "I am a loving kind human" as your default personal identity. 

3. The "O" lesson challenges you to be a "constant source of delight." Its tough, possible and rewarding beyond your expectations. This could be the greatest personal growth tool you will ever experience. 

4. The "V" lesson teaches how to combine your brain power with your loved one's to solve life's greatest challenges. This chapter reveals The Home Model illustration and how to use it. 

5. The "E" lesson reveals that eternity is now here and the way to experience true, meaningful, and achievable satisfaction in life. Hint: it has something to do with love.

We included "24 Hours Of Love At Home And Work" to inspire your loving thoughts about your day. 

Don't forget to read the conclusion of the fable at the end of the book. 

Home is the most important place in the world. Home is where people express loving kindness and learn loving kindness. Home is where there is safety, nurture, cleansing, brushing teeth, playing, snuggling, cooking and baking, eating and feeding, washing dishes and clothes, wearing warm snuggling pajamas, smiling, kissing, tenderness, touching, holding, caressing, combing and brushing hair, praying and inspiring, teaching, studying and learning, reading aloud and singing songs, games, sewing, dressing, encouragement, working together, growing vegetables and flowers, backyard stargazing, having and caring for pets, raising livestock, comforting after failure or loss, tree houses and tents made with sheets and dining room chairs, celebrating achievements, community and becoming independent, practicing musical instruments, gaining work skills, making babies, fixing broken things, celebrating birthdays and holidays, vacations, entertaining neighbors, caring for elders, living and dying. Home is where people can reconnect with their loving kind self.

If you email your intent to purchase I will provide with a signed book plate. bryanleemartin@gmail.com