Archive for November 2009
Does What Boys Think Really Matter Anyway?
It is just an example of the way boys thinks. I’m talking about the movie “Where the Wild Things Are.” Acclaimed as a great movie with high ratings it was less than what I hoped for; an inspiring impactful film with important lessons about life.
One lesson I did get was how boys… well I guess everybody does this… take one thought and try to grasp it. Like when our hero, Max, is in the class room listening to his teacher describe the solar system, its origin and destiny. The teacher fumbles through the scenario of when the Sun runs out of fuel and in the process expands and destroys life on Earth. The only thing boys hear is presentations like this that the Sun is going to destroy the Earth.
Later in the movie, almost out of nowhere Max announces to one of the Wild Things that the Sun was going to die. The Wild Thing, typical of boys, says that is a crazy idea and so is Max.
The Sun is indeed going to die. But here is a thought that is just a difficult for boys and girls, men and women fail to grasp as well: Love is the answer to everything.
Now when you say Love is the answer to everything there are going to be many many Wild Things who will disagree and call the proclaimer of such an idea as “crazy” or stupid. I can just hear it; “Naw awh. Love is not the answer! That is just crazy emotional talk. EVERYBODY knows that. Guns and war and money and commerce and sex and democracy and civility and reason and science and technology…. that is what the answer is!”
All I can say to all that is this… boys don’t know everything.
I’m going to invite you on a quest with me. For the next several months I gong to write a book using this blog as my canvas. My book is called Amorvia Extrasolar. The idea of the book is that love is the driving purpose of life… even in the face of the ultimate cataclysmic events. And that we can do something to literally save the world.
I’d like to write a page a day, about 250 words, and complete the book in about six months. I’d also like your involvement and interaction. In other words I’d like your help.
This has been on my heart for a long time now and I am excited to move forward with it… excited and scary at the same time… you know … making your personal thought so public and subject to what other boys and girls may think and say. But I think we can make a difference in the world and maybe, just maybe this will be one way to do it.
What do you think?
I love you – Bryan Martin
When Do You Persist and When Do You Quit?
When I read the book “Dip” the author said most people stop just before there is a breakthrough. They give up too soon. On the other hand, he said, when the hand writing is on the wall, when the evidence is clear it is foolish to continue.
I say that persistence is one of the most important traits for spirituality and leadership, both for your personal life and your public life.
Wisdom trumps persistence.
When persistence is based on ego then it is not a virtue. In other words if I persist in an endeavor just because it is the right thing to do, but in the course of it my family, my business, even my well-being is compromised then persistence becomes a vice and a function of ego.
You may have heard of the military commander who says, “Just because you’ve been shot doesn’t mean you are dead… you keep going until you drop or help comes.” Now THAT is persistence. You don’t stop until you can’t go any more.
The opposite of persistence is not quitting, it not caring anymore. Acquiescing always proceeds quitting. This is especially true in relationships. Attachment is severed by indifference.
Here is an exercise. Consider the difficult tasks in your life; job, relationships, finances, health/weight, what ever. Ask your self, “have I been shot or am I merely indifferent?” Now you have something to work with. If you’ve been shot, then look for help. If you are indifferent then change your attitude and figure out how to persist.
Wisdom says that whether you achieve your goal or not is not the issue. The issue is did you do what was necessary to help your people and your self the best way possible?
I love you — Bryan
What In The World Will Your Future Self Do?
Future Self vs. Future Generations
Future Self is concept for self improvement where one envisions what and where one wants to be in 5 years and with that end in mind works backwards in creating a plan to accomplish that goal. For instance, if I say that in 5 years I want to be earning a million dollars a years then I would mark where I should be in that process by year 4, year 3, year 2 and year 1. Then I would set out to accomplish those incremental goals. Hypothetically by the end of year 5, if you follow the steps, then I would have achieved that goal.
Money is not the only goal. You could choose travel goals, health goals, weight goals, relationship goals, family planning goals and so on… you get the idea.
I think this is a fabulous idea as far as it goes. It is a great attempt to get your self out of the limiting idea of living for today, surviving the best you can, and just paying the bills this week. It can be a powerful tool. However, your existence is more important than just your Future Self. Self, self, self , self, self.
Your self is limited by time, among other things. Just how much can you do for your self in 50, 60, 70, 80 or 90 years? And what is the meaning of that?
I guess focusing on your Future Self would be great if all there was in life is to make the best of it and when you are done you go to heaven.
But guess what? You are greater than the few years you have on this planet. You are THE link between what can be and what will be. Without your contribution IT won’t get done.
IT is the great future that awaits the generations. My friend Peggy tells me that she is learning about an “Ethical Will.” “The generic purpose of the ethical will is to pass on wisdom and love to future generations.” Check out the article in Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethical_will
Leaving an Ethical Will begins to grasp the idea of going from Future Self to Future Generations.
But we can do more! We can actually give them the tools they need to survive, thrive and excel! We can even give them what they need to escape this dying planet if they need to!
But let’s not get carried away. Let’s begin with the idea of a Future Self with this question: In five years what will I have done to empower future generations. Wow. What a great question!
And here is another one, just for today: By the end of this day what will I have done to increase beauty, truth, love, and well being to my life and the world?
Send me your Future Self for the end of the day.
I love you — Bryan
Future Think Means Giving These Things To Those Who Are Not Yet Born
They liked my talk yesterday about characteristics we need to pass to the next generations. See yesterday’s blog for the list.
I asked if they had other characteristics they wanted to add. They added courage, empathy, honesty, and the ability to work long and hard.
I’m glad they added empathy. I think that falls under the broader category of “loving your neighbor,” but the emphasis is necessary. It was Connie Coberly who said we need to put a face to the out-of-work moms, children in poverty, and people struggling with health issues. Amen. It tweaks our altruism button when we see their faces and get an idea about their pain or how their situation is affecting them. Which, of course, moves us to action.
I want to add exercise. Yes I know that it falls under the “love your self” heading, but, like empathy, it needs special emphasis. Our bodies were made to move and when we don’t bad things happen. It is bad enough that we have to contend with the natural loss of muscle mass over the years, about 10% a decade after 30 years old, but it is another thing all together to just let your body melt away… you shouldn’t let it happen! Exercise that God given body of yours even if you are 90+ years old!
One told me that she felt so good about the list because those were the values and characteristics she inculcated into her family. I felt happy for her but she missed the point of the talk… we have to make sure those things get into the new generations, not just the existing or just past ones. The last item on the list was Future Thinking.
Future Thinking goes beyond the now and the past. Future thinking means figuring out ways to put those good things in the hearts and minds of those who are not born yet!
Moreover… I contend that it is every person’s responsibility to do so for the well-being of the generations.
Moses was a Future Thinking man. As he wrote the Law he was not just thinking about his contemporaries and their children. He was thinking about the children’s children’s children. SO MUST WE!
Future Think is our divine purpose!
I would like to share examples with you about how I see this happening now, but more than that I would love to hear how you see the generations being effected positively by people today. So please respond with your insights about how future generations are being impacted by actions today.
Remember… Future Think!
I love you — Bryan
What You Need To Give To The Next Generation
The Scripture Lesson for November 1 includes insuring that the next generation loves God and keeps the commandments. What do we need to give the next generation?
- Love for God
- Love for neighbor; this is a huge area in terms of characteristics and activities necessary for neighbor love.
- Love for self; healthy, positive, capable, self-empowering, self-competent. — These three (Love God, Neighbor and self) Jennifer and I determined to impart to our children before they were born!
- Ingenuity, creativity, resourcefulness
- Love for learning
- Desire to explore and discover
- Persistence
- Versatility: the ability to enter any culture, interact effectively and feel comfortable without giving up one’s own values, priorities and practices.
- Financial management
- Manage all the world’s resources
- Superb financial skills
- Assertiveness
- Leadership
- Resilience
- Integrity
- Ability to delay gratification
- Future Vision
I’ll have to flesh these out for you at another time.
I Love You – Bryan
